Stars are Just Like Us

When Jimmy Fallon announced the birth of his daughter Winnie last summer, speculation started immediately about how he and his wife Nancy Juvonen built their family. In the comments on web posts about their family there was a pitched battle between the "it's none of our business" camp and the "there is nothing shameful about adoption or surrogacy" camp. I am firmly in the second camp, and I love it when celebrities are open and honest about their struggles and journeys.

After all celebrities are "just like us." and they have taught America a lot about itself. What would people think about adoption had Angelina Jolie, Sandra Bullock, and Connie Britton not shown us that love, not biology or skin color, makes a family? What would people think about surrogacy if Sarah Jessica Parker, Nicole Kidman, and Elton John not proudly introduced their beloved children to the world? And Aisha Tyler and Khloe Kardashian have discussed their struggles with infertility and the pain it has caused them.

We need these role models. We need to know that our families are not the only ones. And our kids need to know that even if they are the only ones in their school, they are part of a much larger community.

And besides, what is the alternative? Is it fair to people trying to conceive to have actresses in their mid 40s say they're just lucky when it's likely more likely they froze their eggs or used an egg donor? Psychologist Amy Wenzel wrote in a web post about the “unrealistic expectations” created by these lies of omission. Dr. Wenzel believes there are more barriers to be broken down, writing, “When a well-known individual does open up about her use of donor eggs, it will be a breakthrough that will serve as a role model for many, many women.”